Welcome back to my blog. I have been undergoing some changes myself. I have been in limbo since October 2010. It sometimes requires that you reflect on how the changes you are doing are manifesting themselves. Since October 2010, I am delighted to tell you that I am on target to reposition myself.I am hopeful that those who have been following my postings have managed to start implementing the changes we have been discussing. These changes are:
a) Commitment to change
b) Discipline
c) Willingness to change
Criticism is defined as disapproval expressed by pointing out faults or shortcomings. No body likes to be criticised, but its a fact of life. To be able to respond to criticism with nobility and detachment is an important life skill, which few of us have. If you respond to criticism without careful consideration, it can easily lead to unnecessary suffering.Criticism can be positive or negative.It all depends on motive and how it is delivered. While criticism in itself is not bad, it becomes a hindrance when it is used to point out that the process of repositioning yourself is not good. As you undergo this process, you are bound to meet people who will discourage you through criticism. It is your ability to withstand unjustified and misdirected criticism.
My experience is that as you reposition yourself, you will meet especially friends and family members who will criticize you just to be mean and condescending due to their own insecurities and failure to change. Usually destructive criticism is prompted by:
- Jealousy
- Fear
- Intimidation
- Ignorance
- Insensitivity
- Perfectionism
- Egocentricity
- Prejudice
- Self-centeredness
When a criticism is delivered to you improperly, the natural tendency is to react, defend, or attack. Here are some tips that can help you to react appropriately.
- Remain quiet. Restrain yourself and let the person complete their criticism.
- Evaluate the source of the criticism. Quickly determine the motive. Ask yourself "Is this person trying to help me or attack me?" Trust your instincts!
- If the person is trying to attack you, don't empower them by reacting angrily. They will quickly know how much they affected you. Ignore them and walk away. Remember you have the choice to accept or reject a criticism. When you can reject it, the person doing the attacking feels deflated or defeated. When you retaliate they feel vindicated.
- If you decide the criticism is constructive but was not delivered properly then the best way to approach it is by saying "I get the feeling you are trying to give me some constructive criticism. I want to clearly understand what you are saying so can you say it again please?" This allows the critic to realize that you do want to learn something from what they have to say. They will then attempt to reword the criticism so you can get the full meaning.
- And most of all work to improve your emotional strength. This gives you resilience against any attack. Build your self-esteem and self-confidence.
As you will agree with me, not everyone will want to see you prospering in any field of your life. Especially if you have been struggling to break the bondage cause by your situation.
So be resolute, sustain the momentum and remain focus, lest undue criticism will destruct you from your agenda.
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